Entry: Desktiny Saturday, December 03, 2005

If thereís one thing that i really dislike about my current work, and you all probably know it, is that all the people that I worked with here are college mates, they knew each other very well, they grow up together, and now they were work together too. They share some kind of emotional bound that make them look like a link that build a strong chain. A very strong one. It makes me envy and dislike at the same time, and believe me when I tell you that it was not easy to fill in at that chain, especially for some one like me. To put it short it was sense of me belong there that I didnít feel all this time.

Ironically, where my heart fell in is at one of those links that build the chain, a lovely one, and also ironically it have a very strong bound for the other link that impossible for me to break because the bound it self is too precious to break. And this matter is tearing my mind, night and day. I donít know where this feeling will lead me, i will follow, may it be the hardest way, full of suffering, and breaking the heart of mine, let it be, I will ready for it. Because to whom my heart fell it was not the choice of mine, and for first time in my life I realize that.


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